THE POWER OF ACCEPTANCE

To conclude our triad on stigmatization, this week I want us to chat for a minute about something that we all need to practice a little more of in our daily lives – ACCEPTANCE.

Arthur Japin said “If you accept others as equals, you embrace them unconditionally, now and forever. But if you let them know that you tolerate them, you suggest in the same breath that they are actually an inconvenience, like a nagging pain or an unpleasant odour you are willing to disregard.”

Acceptance is not merely turning a blind eye to differences in color, creed, culture, nationality, religion, etc. It’s not simply ignoring the things we don’t like or agree with. And it does not lessen our own value in any way.

Acceptance is being able to see the beauty in diversity, and having the ability to appreciate and celebrate the differences in others that make them beautifully unique.

Imagine if every guy on earth looked like Idris Elba. Then Idris Elba would no longer be the gorgeous actor who officially claimed my heart in Obsessed. He would be just another dude.

{I had to include the GIF because … Well, daaaamn!!! 😍😍😍}

Think of all the places you’ve been on vacation, or seen on television. Would Hawaii be as ‘exotic’ without the luaus and hula dancing? Would you even want to visit if it were no different to the concrete suburbia in which you already reside?

But we can’t only appreciate the diversity of peoples and cultures when it suits us – when we want an escape from our own reality, whether that be in person on vacation or vicariously through television and movies.

We need to practice acceptance in our daily lives as well.

Having a gay neighbor doesn’t change the price of butter and cheese at the local supermarket, so what does it matter what they’re doing with their naughty bits, or who they’re doing it with? Having braids or cornrows or locs doesn’t affect a black woman’s ability to do math or send an email, so why should her hairstyle prohibit her from gaining employment?

Being different doesn’t make someone lesser than. But treating them that way can not only make them feel inferior, it can also inflict deep-seated psychological wounds; and these wounds lead to anxiety, depression, and in many cases even a desire to unalive oneself.

How would you feel if you knew that your unwarranted hatred of another human being, based solely off of their race or religion or sexuality, caused them to forcibly remove themself from this earth? Would it bother you, or would you be able to sleep soundly at night knowing that a family was in mourning because of something you said or did?

We need to stop focusing on the inconsequential things that make us different, and instead place more emphasis on the things that unite us. We need to stop buying into and spreading false narratives about people who are outwardly different to us, and instead remember that at their core they are human just like us and they want they same things we do – food and shelter, physical safety and mental security, a sense of belonging, and the ability to achieve one’s potential.

Think back to the Black Lives Matter protests that happened across the globe after George Floyd’s death – people of all colors, religions, and social standings came together as one to say with one voice ‘enough is enough’. But we shouldn’t need a tragedy to allow to see past our differences.

So, to finish off our discussion about stigmatization, I’d like to share a few quotes on the beauty of diversity and the power of acceptance.